Human Posted December 29, 2022 Report Share Posted December 29, 2022 The engineers at GM had a real mean streak back in the '80s when they designed the W platform, or at least the Cutlass Supreme. I'm assuming the Gran Prix, Lumina and Regal are just as bad. The recent cold snap zapped the battery that had been in the car when I bought it four and a half years ago (Interstate MT series). I put the charger on it for almost 24 hours, but it wouldn't come back up, so I decided it was time to replace it. I can't really complain because I have no idea how old the battery was when I got the car, but it doubtless survived every single day of the five-year warranty period and then some. And it performed flawlessly the whole time—until it just didn't. But daaaaaaaaaaaamn! They really tucked that battery in under the driver's side fender. I had to remove the fender support, the washer fluid reservoir, the air intake, and unbolt a fuse/breaker box, just to get to that sucker. And I thought my dad's 2002 Silhouette minivan was bad. Once I got all that stuff out of the way, the battery was very easy to get to, except for the side terminal bolts, which were frozen in place. I wore down the threads on the positive terminal, trying to get it loose and then rounded off the hex head on the ground terminal, without getting it to budge. I finally got it loose with a pair of vice grips, clamped down onto the thicker part of the bolt where jumper cables would go. I am not exaggerating when I say this project fought me every inch of the way. I've lost count of the battery swaps I've done over the years, and on average they take about 30-45 minutes, in and out. I think the toughest battery swap I ever had to do was on the aforementioned Silhouette, which took about an hour and a half in 90+ degree heat. At least today's high was only around 60. But this job took over four freakin' hours, including going to the Interstate battery store here in town to get another battery, just like the one that came out of it. I thought about getting one from Costco, which is what's in my daily driver, and I probably should have for the difference in price, although I don't think the Costco batteries are quite as good. But the bottom line was I wanted to put a battery in that car that I could reasonably expect to last for five or more years so I don't have to go through this hell again anytime soon. Sorry, I just needed to vent. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rich_e777 Posted December 29, 2022 Report Share Posted December 29, 2022 Grease the bolts for the cross beam support and battery clamp bolt! Not sure about any sort of lube for the terminals themselves but I like to wire brush the battery terminals and cable ends and never had a problem with rust. A ratcheting 8mm or even an adjustable wrench will usually pop those cable off an 87 or 85 series battery. You really dont need the cables to be more than snug, IIRC the FSM calls for ft inches over lbs so it shouldnt be that tight. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Human Posted December 30, 2022 Author Report Share Posted December 30, 2022 Every bolt I turned today, save for the hose clamps on the air intake, got a liberal dousing with CRC Freeze Off, which is one of the best penetrating lubricants I've ever used. A little dielectric grease on the terminals of a side post battery never hurts. I used an 8mm socket on a 1/4-inch drive ratchet to take the positive terminal loose but the negative terminal was just too stuck and called for more drastic measures. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
White93z34 Posted December 30, 2022 Report Share Posted December 30, 2022 Just be Glad its not a Dodge Stratus! rich_e777 and primergray 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Human Posted January 1, 2023 Author Report Share Posted January 1, 2023 The worst I've ever heard of was from a student I had a few years ago, who had done an internship at a local Cadillac/Chevy dealership. A local funeral ome brought in a hearse, based on a Cadillac DTS, for a battery replacement. The original sedan had had the battery under the back seat, and the shop that did the custom coachwork had left the battery in its original location, without providing any way to access it. They had to cut hole to get to the battery, and then fabricate an access panel to cover it. Fortunately, the panel was concealed from view when the hearse was carrying a casket. I'd have hated to see the bill for that battery swap. primergray, 94 olds vert and White93z34 2 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rich_e777 Posted January 1, 2023 Report Share Posted January 1, 2023 That must be a common way of doing it, I looked at a hearse not too long ago that looked to have the same thing done to it. I wanted to see what wouldve been involved in putting the rear seats back in and passed on it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bluecalais79 Posted January 2, 2023 Report Share Posted January 2, 2023 Got to agree this job is really bad. Next one will be an AGM from Interstate, I don't care if they are $400, whatever lasts the longest, I truly hate this job. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Human Posted January 3, 2023 Author Report Share Posted January 3, 2023 16 hours ago, bluecalais79 said: Got to agree this job is really bad. Next one will be an AGM from Interstate, I don't care if they are $400, whatever lasts the longest, I truly hate this job. Yeah, next time, I'm taking it someplace where I can let them install it for me. My back hurt for three days after doing that swap. I love being self-reliant and all that, but I'm getting too old for this stuff. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.